Getting Back Into The Spirit of Surfing?

[jeweledbluerose23]

More than a few hours ago, I learned that the person whom guided me through and helped me get through the roughest spots of getting my business off the ground, a person I was close to, and viewed as a role model, passed away from a heart attack today. :( So needless to say I haven't really been in the mood for much other then just wanting to curl up and act like today never existed. But instead have been trying to keep busy, so I don't turn into a blubbering idiot.

What are some of the things you guys do to get yourself back into the spirit of things after you just had one of them days? Just curious, never know one of your ideas might help.

[kerberos]

Hi.

Wow, my thoughts and prayers are with you.
That is hard in anyway you see it, I know.
You question of what I do...is easy to answer.
When I'm down, when I'm sad, when I cry and when I think nothing is going to be better...I guide my inner thoughts and mind towards these words: It could have been worse...
You know, its always something that is worse than the worst you experience in an given moment...I think of people that have it worse than me or experienced a worse moment than the one I'm in...That comforts me for a while..just enough to get over the edge to begin to think positive once again.

Otherwise its best to find your way your self...that is one of the roads in "life-experience" uhh, sadly.

Well, You are in my thoughts ;)

Ole

[jeweledbluerose23]

Thanks. I do know that some of life's experiences aren't all that grand. Heck been through many of those less than desirable life experiences. Usually I am good at picking myself up, dusting myself off, and moving on, but the death of someone I am close to I generally take really hard. Been trying to think of ways to get my thinking back to where it was before it happened, but it usually takes me weeks to get over it. Knowing how I generally shut myself off from the world, after a death has occurred, I figure with a business to think of now wouldn't be a good thing to just cut myself off from reality so to speak. So trying really hard to find that "happy place" to call my own.

[cschulzetx]

I'm sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you.
When I feel down I have one friend that I vent to. I'm just lucky that Adam has an open ear all the time, because lately I have been venting and venting. It's great to have a friend like him.

Once again I'm sorry for your loss
God Bless
cschulzetx

[jeweledbluerose23]

My friends will probably get an ear full this weekend. Most of them work nights, so I don't like bothering them to much during the day. Just how I am. So am greatful to have a nice forum to come to when needing to let something out. Thanks.

[pericles]

My condolences on your loss. It's ok to take a break I guess. Spend some time with your family and friends. Just remember the community here at StartXChange and you'll be back when you're ready. Take care!

[msbeejay]

Time heals all wounds, eventually...

Maybe a change of scenery, go for walks, ride a bike
whatever it takes to override your thoughts...

Just keep busy and hang out with your friends...

God Bless and Keep on surfing...

[mysticblu1]

My condolences on your loss. The feeling of life and the spirit that drives you will come back in time as pain fades - thankfully. Remember you mentor, and by doing something that would have carried his approval you would honour him, and make the pain bearable.

Good Luck
Louis

[revjoybunny]

Hi
I am sorry for the loss of you mentor I will pray for you and his family

But getting back into the swing of surfing is not easy when one feels down I know when my father was seriously ill in hospital last week I was just wanting to get down to him and be there and the surfing well that was not on my mind as a result the number of credits and shows goes down. Sit in front of your pc and surf i think its the only way to get back into it. But dont do hours do a small amount at a time when you can fit it in little and often is probably the best for you right now. I would say you need time to grieve and think of the good times as well as the bad. if you need to see it this way take your business and keep it going as a testament to the help your mentor gave you. It may help if you see the surfing that way too. They say time heals all wounds but I have found it doesnt exactly heal it makes you more able to deal with it.

take care and let us know how you do

[jeweledbluerose23]

Thanks everyone for your condolences, thoughts and prayers. They are much appreciated, has brought a small smile to my face to see how so many care enough to help a member who is down.

Last night did some thinking, and though my heart and mind hurt right now, decided that mornings I can work/surf to my hearts content and off hours will allow myself to go through the grieving processes, so I am not bottling it up inside. My husband has been a great help too. Last night after I had broke down into a sobbing mess, he filled orders and the like, so I could have my moment of just wanting to be alone. It will be a long road with it's up moments and down moments, but as before I just have to keep telling myself that I will get through this and it's not the end of the world.

Thanks again everyone!

[nsant46]

Hi,
I am very sorry for your loss.
Try to think our life is also this, also suffering and passing away.
In the mean while, try to keep leaving too!:)
Our life is generous, it helps us to afford every suffering and keep leaving, soon as a robot, then almost normally, after naturally.
Go wherever you like, but DON'T where you maybe were with your mentor: it can be only more suffering.
Your mentor and you are in my prayers.
God Bless
Noemi

[frankieteo]

Hi jeweledbluerose23,

Would like to extend my condolence for the lost of your dear late friend. Pray to the Lord & Universe.. you will get over it. "The Universe knows the bigger picture. Let it deal with the timing of this. Meanwhile, do whatever you can to keep focussed & open yourself to something better."

It took me years to stop thinking of all the sadness for the lost of my late elder brother at age 40 in year2000 when he un-expectedly left these world. He got a 9yr old daughter then. My dad was more sad then me for the love of his eldest son whom he groomed & raised.

Then in year2005, my father had to leave because of heart-attack. He is a strong dad when he left as he knew, & he just wished to live for a couple more years if possible before his departure. I keep thinking of him everyday for over a year.

Today, I pray for all that have to leave this world & some day we have to go too. Yes, it takes time to heal. Continue praying & you will be better in times to come.

God bless us all..

Take care,
Frankie

[jeweledbluerose23]

Thanks nsant and frankieteo for your kind words and prayers. They are appreciated. For now I am just taking things one day at a time, and let things run their due course. I know it won't last forever, but the now, well it hurts, but know that in time it to will lessen a bit for it to more bearable.

[pericles]

Hi jeweledbluerose23,

We'll miss you here. Just think of us as your family on the net ok? You'll be in our thoughts and prayers. We're hoping you'll be alright soon. May God also be with you always.

Lastly I want to share with you a beautiful poem:

Poem on Love and Death
by William Penn

They that love beyond the world cannot be separated by it.
Death cannot kill what never dies.
Nor can spirits ever be divided, that love and live in the same divine principle,
the root and record of their friendship.
If absence be not death, neither is theirs.

Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the seas; they live in one another still.
For they must needs be present, that love and live in that whch is omnipresent.
In this divine glass they see face to face; and their converse is free, as well as pure.
This is the comfort of friends, that though they may be said to die, yet their friendship and society are, in the best sense, ever present, because immortal.

William Penn, from More Fruits of Solitude


BTW while we're on the subject of poems, I just want to share another beautiful one (it's about romantic love) :):

Sonnet 17
by Pablo Neruda

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.

I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where,
I love you simply, without problems or pride:
I love you in this way
because I don't know any other way of loving
but this, in which there is no I nor you,
so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand,
so intimate that when I fall asleep
it is your eyes that close.

© Pablo Neruda

[nsant46]

Hi jeweledbluerose23.
Be quiet!:)
You are well doing: one thingh at a time.
But remember YOU HAVE TO BE ALWAYS ALIVE: our life is wonderfoul, it's a miracle, it's too short too waste it!
God Bless
Noemi

[pskovgaard]

He'd be proud of you getting success by doing what he taught you, that's how I feel, when I think of my late father-in-law, whom I respected and loved. He would be 67 today.

[redi2wk]

My sympathies. You're doing great. Hang in there.

[nsant46]

Hi again jeweledbluerose23,

I hope you are a bit better, even you are so young (23, is it?)!:)
I am 62 and have unfortunately a great experience of life, so I am here now to try to help again you to BE ALIVE!
Believe me, my dear, he would you alive and happy!:)
BTW, it's very hard to you, but you have to be alive for you and for him.
Love
Noemi

[inge]

What are some of the things you guys do to get yourself back into the spirit of things after you just had one of them days? Just curious, never know one of your ideas might help.

jeweledbluerose23,
your situation is or will be experienced by all of us, and more than once for most.
Life is wonderful, but it's not fair.
We feel sorrow when we lose a friend, and we should.
But we should also think: Did that person have a happy life? If so, be glad. Did he not? Then know that it may be better for him now.

Suffering, illness and death are natural and necessary parts of life. Let's hope that they won't fill our lives completely, but give room for happy and painfree moments.

Time heals all wounds, and what remains are a few scars and some memories. Keep the good ones. Be grateful for what your friend gave you, and what you had the chance to give.

Some of us must wait and suffer for years before death takes us home. Be happy for those who could go quickly, without too much suffering and pain. It was worse for us than it was for them.

We all need time to recover. Take your time.

[jeweledbluerose23]

Hi again jeweledbluerose23,

I hope you are a bit better, even you are so young (23, is it?)!:)
I am 62 and have unfortunately a great experience of life, so I am here now to try to help again you to BE ALIVE!
Believe me, my dear, he would you alive and happy!:)
BTW, it's very hard to you, but you have to be alive for you and for him.
Love
Noemi

Noemi:
I am 26 years old, the 23 (assuming you got that from my username) was something added ages ago when I joined up with a program that jeweledbluerose was already taken.Thanks for checking up on me, it means a lot and is appreciated.

To All:
Thanks so much for your kind words, they have helped me keep going in a way that I know my mentor would be proud of. I know he's in a better place now, though will always be watching over me and through his teachings will continue to guide me, just not as he once did. Taking a few days to reflect on things, reminded me of so much more and think I have found my "happy place" for now. Thanks again everyone and I'm proud to call you all part of my family, even if it is just net wise . Hope everyone had a great weekend and hope your week goes well.

[revjoybunny]

(((((((((((((((jeweledbluerose))))))))))))))))))

[jeweledbluerose23]

group hug time ((((((((((((((((((((((((everyone)))))))))))))))))) ))))))))) :)

[xxclixxx]

Thanks for sharing!

I had something similar happen to me when StartXchange was just starting out! I got this real nasty email from someone, he decided he was too upset to give me a chance to help him out. Well after replying we got to chatting and he helped me improve quite a bit! He had cancer in his neck and didn't have much time left, and then eventually I just never heard from him again.

I hope you get back into the spirit soon ;-)

[lajab5]

Sorry for your lost, I would go out in nature and take a "walk" with my friend and talk about how much we meant to each other and how much fun we had in life, and all that we did.

God bless

[jeweledbluerose23]

Thanks for sharing!

I had something similar happen to me when StartXchange was just starting out! I got this real nasty email from someone, he decided he was too upset to give me a chance to help him out. Well after replying we got to chatting and he helped me improve quite a bit! He had cancer in his neck and didn't have much time left, and then eventually I just never heard from him again.

I hope you get back into the spirit soon ;-)

Thanks Tim. :) It's been a royal pain in the backside the last couple of days to stay focused on surfing, since my mind wants to wander back to thinking of my mentor, but I've done pretty good so far in the surfing aspect of things, and it has helped me keep my mind on the life of a living person so to speak. It will probably take some time before I am back up to surfing the near 2,000 pages that I was, but I'm just taking things a day at a time, and going from there. I know it won't last forever, so just gotta take it in stride.

lajab5: Thanks for your kind words. Going for walks has helped in some aspects, but since most of my friends work nights I usually use my walks as a time to reflect and remember good times. Or depending on the situation going for walks has helped clear my mind enough to get the days work accomplished. Thanks again. :)

[samacc]

Jewels,
Your friend is lucky to have someone hold them in such fond memory. Thats what most people want is an ongoing legacy of family and friends. Your pain and sorrow is actually
a tribute to that person.